Have you ever been so in love with someone that you could feel it every time you talked to that person? Did you tell them how you felt and what was in your heart? Did it make any difference to them?
Have you ever hurt so bad from it that you just felt sick with heartache? The bad news is there really is no way to change this. This sort of love usually occurred in high school. That feeling of finding the right one and somehow knowing that you could spend the rest of your life with that person. But you also knew deep down somewhere that it would never happen, but at the same time, deeper in your soul you could see that future.
So here is the scenario. There is a guy who likes this girl, but she never really notices him. One day the girl sees the guy driving his new hot car and stops him in the hallway at school to ask if it is his car. At that point in time the guy is thinking of how nice it would be if that was his girlfriend. The two become really good friends and soon the guy asks the girl to be his girlfriend... she says no, but in so many words. The guy eventually find out she is interested in his best friend. Talk about a kick in the gut. As time goes on the the girl and the guy are still really good friends, but she still doesn't feel the same for the guy as he does for her. In the process of this relationship, Being friends as it is, the guy continually expresses his love. It makes the girl sad in some ways because she knows that he is being sincere, but there is no change in how she really feels.
In one way or another this has happened to all of us. But why? what was it? Were we too ugly, too skinny, too fat, Hair to long, too short? WHAT!? Maybe it was nothing physical at all. So we ask ourselves this question? Did we do this to someone else and they are thinking what we are thinking of right now? Did we unknowingly hurt them by not having the same feelings for them as they did for us? And so on.
As the years press on you never really know what will happen. Sometimes the feelings fade away and you fall in love with someone else and that other person is forgotten. But what happens when those feelings come back, and they can. You begin to start brainstorming of all the things you said and did that could have been changed to make that person love you. But again, deep down, you always know it will never happen and never could.
Perhaps you tell yourself that if you could go back in time and change something what would it be? Would it make any difference? Could you do or say something different to make it happen the way you want? Probably not, No matter how much we would want to change the past to suit how we feel today, it would not matter. We may actually change something that could cause our lives to become worse in the future. It probably wouldn't matter how careful you could be. It may actually turn out better for you or extremely worse, making you feel much more heartache than before.
What it eventually comes down to is you were not meant to be with that person, no matter how much you may want it to be. Life is funny that way, you are never sure of what will happen next but you have a pretty good idea it won't go the way you want? We have all these ideas and fantasies in our heads of how we want our lives to be with someone that we may never have. You try to see your life through their eyes and thoughts hoping that it will make a difference. You think how they may be thinking of you, Hoping that they assume they made the mistake of not accepting who you once were, but who you are now. Trying to imagine what that person thinks of you now is futile. they may be very impressed with your life and the things you have done and accomplished and maybe, just maybe, be a little envious of you. But will it make them love you the way you wanted to in the past? Doubtful. Probable? Maybe, depending on weather or not they are married and have kids and a good wholesome marriage. Or are they totally lost and here is you chance to help them find the way. That's usually the scene we all play over and over in our head knowing that that's not the case.
Hope. how do define a word that already has the answer we don't want to hear? You can keep asking yourself "what happened?" What did you do wrong? Nothing, you did nothing wrong but yet nothing happened either. Was it love or just deep infatuation for something you knew would never come your way. If years have past and not one thought of that person crossed your mind and then suddenly they "pop" into your head and those same thoughts are running through your mind, you may very well have been in love or there may be an issue of closure that you never got the chance to take. Either way it's done and there is no going back and no changing the past. It is a very sad thought but it is real and it hurts but you have to take the other person into consideration. Are they happy? If they are that may be just one step into helping yourself let them go.
One of the best remedies for this talking about it to someone you can trust, because someday those feelings will go away. Holding on to past dreams and hopes are the some of the best ways to either improve or ruin your life. I suppose it depends on the road you take now.
Should the first time machine come on line anytime down the road, I am pretty sure 99% of us will be standing in line to take that chance and see if the unchangeable can be changed. All I can say is good luck to all of you.
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